さびしすぎてレズ風俗に行きましたレポ

SABISHISUGITE REZU FUZOKU NI IKIMASHITA REPORT

MANGA

STATUS
COMPLETE
VOLUMES
1
RELEASE
July 17, 2016
CHAPTERS
6

DESCRIPTION

A hugely popular comic on Pixiv, My Lesbian Experience With Loneliness offers readers an honest and heartfelt look at one young woman’s exploration of her sexuality, mental well-being, and growing up in our modern age.

(Source: Seven Seas Entertainment)

Note: Includes 1 extra chapter.

CAST

Kabi Nagata
Yuka

CHAPTERS

RELATED TO SABISHISUGITE REZU FUZOKU NI IKIMASHITA REPORT

MANGA DramaHitori Koukan Nikki

REVIEWS

meniel
100/100
Painfully honest portrayal of depression and society's indifference to suffering. A strong and touching autobiography.
In this touching autobiography Kabi Nagata narrates with honesty the ten years of her life that followed high school and saw her slowly drifting away from society. This volume not only manages to present a realistic depiction of mental illness, but it also hints at how our society can be cold, distant and ultimately pathogenic.

A modern Eleanor Rigby, Kabi Nagata looses her "place to belong to" shortly after graduating high school. Without friends and a goal to shape her life, she falls into depression. All her efforts to get back to a reassuring routine are useless, as she starts suffering from disordered eating, trichotillomania (i.e. compulsive hair pulling) and other disabling symptoms that prevent her from keeping a job or a "normal" life.

Despite the chibi art style and the pastel pink colour of the panels, what this manga is actually illustrating is anything but cute. It is the almost life-long struggle of a girl who cannot find her place in society; a society that implicitly but cruelly rejects her and her need for affection.

Sadly, 1/10 of people living in occidental countries suffer from depression during their life and will be able to directly relate to the situation depicted in this manga. However, the majority of people luckily does not have experience of binge eating or self harming, and MLEWL's themes could be alienating to them. Just like No Longer Human's well-known protagonist, Kabi is someone who has failed at being human, that is, at integrating into human society and at making connections with other humans.

When telling her story to "normal" people, it could appear weird or incomprehensible. But unlike Osamu Dazai's alter ego Kabi Nagata retains her humanity even in her estranged state. Her writing style is so powerful in its honesty that everyone can relate to the feelings of sorrow, isolation and despair beneath the protagonist's mental symptoms. Kabi's painful loneliness, her striving for her parents' approval and the excruciating need of human contact are told through eloquent visual metaphors. That makes it easy to relate at least to some of her struggles.

Paradoxically, Kabi Nagata talks to our human side: the one that needs friends, that tries hard even though it's difficult; the one that loves and wants to be loved.

A discouraging portrayal of this world as cold, alienating and indifferent to human suffering slowly emerges. All the people portrayed in MLEWL are caring and supporting of the protagonist. Her parents, despite their flaws and lack of understanding, are always there for her. Strangers cheers for her. Nobody is ever shown having a negative interaction with Kabi. But somehow this is not enough.

Trying to satisfy her psychological needs with an escort marks Kabi's final, desperate attempt at creating a connection with someone. Being unable to open up to others, this ends up in a predictable failure. To assimilate this complex experience the author pours all her pent up sadness and loneliness into this volume: a complete and total disclosure of her intimate self, for all to read, albeit with still some distance from her real person.

Kabi Nagata asks her readers who the least human actually is: someone who is flawed and struggling, or a society where the only love you can get is the one you buy?

MLEWL sheds light on the cruel reality of depression and hints at society's role in it. As this kind of suffering is getting more and more common, MLEWL represents an important work definitely worth reading.
★★★★★
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Benkei
86/100
Spoiler-free review of My Lesbian Experience With Loneliness. The raw autobiography of someone struggling.
════ ⋆★⋆ ════ Considerations ════ ⋆★⋆ ════ ● __This is a spoiler-free review.__ ● 80+ in my rating means really good. ● This manga deals with heavy themes such as __depression, self-harm, eating disorders, and suicidal thoughts__. If you feel like those themes are sensitive topics for you, please skip the manga. If you are struggling with any issue, __call your country's hotline__. Take care ♡. ════ ⋆★⋆ ════ The Story ════ ⋆★⋆ ════ Kabi feels totally lost after graduating from high school. Losing her sense of self and having no aspirations, she start spiraling down, now she has to look for what's the meaning of self and how to exist in society. The story of My Lesbian Experience With Loneliness is really good. I honestly didn't expect much, but I was positively surprised because the author lays down her biography in a pretty raw way. By reading this work, you feel like a close friend is telling you their deepest struggles. One thing that I really would like to mention is how the author explores and talks about her sexuality. Although I do support LGBTQIA+, I don't understand a large part of it as I am not part of it. The way that the author talks about her queerness and lesbianism was pretty interesting for me to read. I was able to understand her point of view and empathize with her. ════ ⋆★⋆ ════ The Art Style ════ ⋆★⋆ ════ The art style, although simple, is really good. Most of the time, there's no background and we're facing the author's struggles and thoughts. Her facial expressions are really well done. Now, what really takes this work to the next level and puts it on really well for me is how she artistically describes her emotional struggle through art. If you have ever tried to write about emotions, you know how hard it is to describe something like happiness or sadness without using these words. (me-irl) The author is able to explain deep emotional and mental struggles (like social pressure, her many "selfs," and even self-harming) through her doodles and words. It's something outstanding that I personally think makes it easier to empathize with her struggles. ════ ⋆★⋆ ════ The Characters ════ ⋆★⋆ ════ There are a small number of characters in this work. Kabi, her parents, and a few supporting characters. Nothing besides Kabi is developed, but that's expected in an autobiography. As I always like to talk about the main characters, Kabi was amazing. Autobiography without hiding all the dark parts of herself. I couldn't ask for anything else. ‎ ════ ⋆★⋆ ════ Conclusion ════ ⋆★⋆ ════ If you're like me, you skip everything and read only the conclusion because you don't want to get spoiled with other themes. So I will try to be brief on this point: Read it. If you can go through all the sensitive topics, this work is really interesting. It can help you understand a bit more about the hardships of someone else, and it's always helpful to learn about someone else's struggles, as we never know who might be struggling right now. ★__EDIT__: After further looking into my list and through all the talk I had with a lot of people _post-review_, I changed the previous score from 8 to 8.6.
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Cainhu69
100/100
Sexo gay realmente muda a vida de alguém
Eu sempre quis escrever reviews por aqui, mas sempre acabava desistindo da por causa de alguma insegurança minha. Só que esse mangá foi muito especial pra mim porque, mesmo sendo um relato extremamente pessoal da autora, eu sinto como se ela tivesse escrito minha prórpia história em vários momentos do mangá. Acho que o que eu quero falar aqui é desses momentos que eu me identifico tanto, então talvez esse review fique muito ruim.

Relação com os outros
Desde o começo do mangá, a autora fala sobre sua dependência com validação externa, principalmente dos próprios pais. Isso a fez entrar em um loop eterno de decadência pra sua saúde mental: Não recebo validação externa --> Por isso não consigo ser produtiva --> Por isso não recebo validação externa. Como uma forma de sair dessa ciclo, a personagem acaba destruíndo sua saúde física além da mental, porém isso funciona só por um tempo até que o ciclo volte novamente. Em um momento ela percebe que não vai conseguir situação e tenta fazer pequenas mudanças na sua rotina, o que faz com que sua saúde melhore. Porém, essas pequenas mudanças não são o suficiente pra conseguir e tão sonhada aprovação dos pais. Até que ela percebe que na verdade todo esse esforço na verdade não era pra receber a aprovação dos pais, mas sim pra agradar um outro "eu", um "eu" que saberia o que seus pais esperam dela e por isso se esforça para agradá-los. Essa percepção faz muito sentido olhando pro jeito que a autora desenha o mangá: focando quase 100% apenas na protagonista, nas suas expressões e muitas vezes ignorando o que é "externo".A partir disso ela se esforça para entender o que o "eu" de verdade realmente quer, e ela descobre que é sexo.
Sexualidade
A protagonista sempre teve uma relação estranha com sua sexualidade, sempre evitando saber mais sobre isso. Mas depois que entende que ela realmente queria experimentar da fruta sagrada chamada sexo, ela começa a cuidar de si mesma com muito mais carinho. Pra mim, o momento que o traço da autora mais funciona é na hora de tratar da sexualidade: as cenas de sexo são tão apáticas e até um pouco desconfortáveis, pois o sexo não era algo que iria salvar completamente a protagonista da forma que ela estava pensando. Mas mesmo com essa decepção, ela acaba se sentindo realizada e passa a ser mais gentil consigo mesma.

Conclusão
Esse mangá é realmente muito especial pra mim, eu também sempre fui muito dependente de validação externa, e por isso sempre fui muito inseguro. Mesmo não sendo me identificando exatamente como a autora, eu também sempre tive problemas pra aceitar minha própria sexualidade. Também sempre fui ruim em interagir com outras pessoas. Todas essas coisas me fizeram amar muito esse mangá e acho que pelo menos todo mundo consegue se identificar com a autora em algum ponto. Essa review realmente ficou bem realmente bem medíocre, mas se você leu até aqui, muito obrigado. (e perdão pelo coitadismo)
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